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vashdaman said:
Did anyone else watch that "Japan : fall of the rising sun" programme on BBC 3 earlier? Not really anything I haven't already heard before, but damn it's a grim reminder of just how grim Japan's work culture is. 13 hour days 6 days a week, erhghhh. Japan, stop working your people to death, literally.
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Caught bits of it. Yeah, just sounded horrible at times, that woman talking about her boyfriend working from 8am to 3am and then back to work at 8 again. The house with 20 people living in it was interesting. Didn't like the woman presenting though, hated the way she spoke.
 
vashdaman said:
Did anyone else watch that "Japan : fall of the rising sun" programme on BBC 3 earlier? Not really anything I haven't already heard before, but damn it's a grim reminder of just how grim Japan's work culture is. 13 hour days 6 days a week, erhghhh. Japan, stop working your people to death, literally.
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Ooh I'll have to check out iPlayer but will probably be at earliest tomorrow. I'm currently inputting data (very exciting) into Excel as I'm a research volunteer over the Summer and then work soon till 10:30pm! :<
 
vashdaman said:
13 hour days 6 days a week, erhghhh. Japan, stop working your people to death, literally.
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That'll be us soon vash, unless we can find a way to crash the housing market, make the older generation pay for their own damn upkeep or increase the influence of trade unions in the private sector.
 
That'll be us soon vash, unless we can find a way to crash the housing market, make the older generation pay for their own damn upkeep or increase the influence of trade unions in the private sector.
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Maybe, but I don't know. At least over here, when things are going badly we'll have street protests or even riot if worst comes to worst, Japanese seem to have a much higher threshold before they resort to such action. In many ways this is admirable and I'm obviously not condoning rioting, but it some ways it's nice to know that if the situation in your country get's outrageous, you can always just wile out.

I also hate that attitude of "young people shouldn't burden others by asking for help".
 
^ That's the kind of thing people post on their Facebook statuses that makes me hide their posts in the news feed.

Nothing against moments of soul-searching (and certainly nothing against discussing the merits or challenges of a more solitary existence) but why not elaborate if you want to talk about stuff?
 
ayase said:
^ That's the kind of thing people post on their Facebook statuses that makes me hide their posts in the news feed.

Nothing against moments of soul-searching (and certainly nothing against discussing the merits or challenges of a more solitary existence) but why not elaborate if you want to talk about stuff?
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I feel that all too often my feelings are not considered and I'm the one that's making compromises without the gestures ever being returned.

Last night was pretty much an example of this for me, not a huge thing, but something I think happens on too much of a regular basis. So here's the quick recap: I made plans with the 4 of us to go play pool for a few hours last night, just as a chilled night hanging out since 2 of us (myself being one) were working the next day. So I meet up with first friend and he says he can't be bothered with pool and asks if we can just go hang out at the pub, that's fine, no problem we'll just hang out there then. We go to the pub, our other friends meet us there and after a couple of drinks they want to go to this particular Irish bar. Again, not much of a problem that's what they want and we'll just hang out there then. so 11:30 rolls around and I mention that if we want to get the last train home it's in 10 minutes. I'm suddenly met with a perturbed look and a snappy answer, "I'm not getting the last train".

This had been the plan from earlier when we intially were going to play pool, but this was no longer acceptable it seemed. They wanted to stay a bit longer and we'd share a taxi home. I was a bit annoyed but relented easily. As time goes on the conversation turns to "well, let's go out all night", I wasn't asked, I was told. When I said I didn't want to stay out as I was working the next day (11 hour shift) I didn't recieve a "that's cool, I understand if you want to go home, but we're going to stay out". Instead I got: "So? I've went out loads of times and went into work the next day". The complete failure to understand that not everyone is the same/would do the same thing and that I was somehow in the wrong by wanting to leave, that everything is purely one way or no way just really angered and hurt me. It's a small thing but these things just add up, admittedly I have cooled on it a bit in work today but I have no doubt I'll be made to be the bad guy because I don't adhere to the "social norm", either that or it won't be mentioned.
 
Sometimes you've just got to roll with the punches. If you're in that mindset (which is understandable because of you're next days work) then the evening will suck pretty much. However, sometimes you've got to go at things with open arms. There will be many more times that this will happen. You'll probably be on the giving end this time too.

One thing I will say though is if you moan that you need to be home or are going home, do it.
 
20thCenturyBoy said:
I hate my friends, really don't know why I bother with them sometimes, I'd be better off alone.
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being a lone is the best thing your better off

at least you'll have the time to-

have time for your self
discover stuff about your self
and do what you want to do.
 
After 4 days off ill last week due to a combination of fainting, throwing up hourly and sleeping patterns being thrown to the wind (i was awake 2 days without sleep)

Saturday was a rollercoaster waiting to happen: I'd spent all day washing and waxing my car, cleaning both inside and out and was really pleased with the tyres and alloys coming up well once i'd cleaned them out. Fired up the car and drove to the gf's cousins engagement party and noticed the orange engine light was on on the dashboard. All my power was gone and i couldn't get the revs up enough to get into 3rd gear.

Was really worried that things weren't going so well, sat reading on my phone about the problem and possible outcomes before calling kayls friend who is a mechanic to see if he'd know what it was, he was actually in luton at the time so drove to the party and in the rain we stood there with the hood up checking it over. after unplugging sensors and spark plugs then plugging them in again and giving it 30mins to stand we fired her up again and the light was gone. No idea what it was but that scared the hell out of me as dean (gf's sisters bf) had that problem a few weeks ago and it turned out to be faulty wiring which caused him £600, my best mate had the same thing happen the other month and cost him £400 to get all the wiring in his car redone.

We'd just booked out holiday for the middle of august that day so the thought of finding £1200 to pay for the holiday and car would kill me financially until payday (next thursday)

Owe the gf £500 as she helped cover the holiday, which was nice..... considering i paid over £800 last year to take her to egypt in a 5 star hotel for 2 weeks all inclusive :p
 
All the 'better off alone' type comments do worry me. Each to their own to some level I guess, but humans are supposed to be social creatures. I don't think you can really be happy shut up on your own in a dark roomw atching anime all day every day :p
 
Ah, but if you happen to be an unsociable type of human, isn't the pressure to act in a social way - even if it is unpleasant - rather cruel?

Modern UK society champions extraversion and social interaction, but I think that kicking back and enjoying your own company can be perfectly enjoyable for some of us. Camping up and marathoning anime in the dark sounds magnificent :D

R
 
The balance between having time to yourself and being social is ideal in life i'd say, one shouldn't take hold over the other.

Unfortunately my social life outweighs my "solo time" as i tend to catch up with that time in an evening between 12 and 2am. apart form that i'm usually out with friends or the gf's family.

Life is, as they say - what you make it. So whichever the preference, surely the point that whatever you're doing is making you happy is the main thing.
 
I agree that alone time can be good, I'm huge on personal space and time (in fact I think I've only had 2 or 3 people visit me in my new place since I move din in Feb since I'm quite fussy with personal space) but I still think social interaction is necessary to be truely happy.

I'd say if you are 'the unsociable type of human' there's something broken there already. I kinda refuse to believe anyone really happy and totally healthy would be unsociable.

I just didn't like the 'you don't need friends they just let you down' kinda mentality. **** happens, you dust yourself off and get back out there. I've been completely walked all over by someone recently but I won't write the rest of the world off for the behaviour of that person, you learn lessons and move on, hiding is rarely the answer... only when monsters are involved.
 
Isn't that a little biased? You might well only feel fulfilled when you have some social interaction, but to say everyone must feel the same way or they must be broken feels unfair. To use a silly example, I strongly dislike coffee, but it would be wrong to declare that anyone who does must be broken simply because I personally cannot see how drinking it could possibly be enjoyable.

Apologies for being so belligerent about this point; I've been inconvenienced a lot by people who expect me to enjoy real world socialisation in my life (all the more so because I'm female, and girls are supposed to be friendly). I simply don't like it, and see it as nothing more than a means to an end and a source of stress. There is little that sounds less enjoyable than just going out with some friends to hang out or pass the time (and I assure you I consider myself neither unhappy nor unhealthy) ^^;

R
 
I don't know. I'm not telling anyone they have to go out today or that they have to drop other things to be social or that being social has to be the most important thing to them.

Just being of the attitude 'I don't need other people they are all terrible anyway' seems very broken to me and promoting that as a message to other people a little dangerous. There's a difference between that kind of thing and enjoying time to yourself more than time out socialising. Anyone with that kind of message doesn't strike me as a happy person.

Don't get me wrong I spend most of my evenings by myself and I'm probably more antisocial than most of you, but I'd go as far as saying it's pretty much medically proven that interaction with people is needed to be healthy.

I am also fairly sure anyone who feels fulfilled without coffee is terribly broken, so sorry Rui :p That said I think a life without other people is more like a life without liquid than a life without only coffee... but people have done it and survived and it's up to you what you do I guess.

Everyone has a balance but I don't think the balance should ever be always surrounded or always alone.
 
Rui said:
Isn't that a little biased? You might well only feel fulfilled when you have some social interaction, but to say everyone must feel the same way or they must be broken feels unfair. To use a silly example, I strongly dislike coffee, but it would be wrong to declare that anyone who does must be broken simply because I personally cannot see how drinking it could possibly be enjoyable.
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Social interaction is an interesting area, there are many studies which suggest that in order to maintain a so called 'healthy state of mind' is to have good friendships/links with other people. I can see why, just by talking to someone can sometimes help to alleviate negative feelings to a degree. However, being alone is always potrayed less than positive.

From my own perspective, I am friendly with a lot of people but I just find most people to be a bit shallow as they do not share the same interests as me. I'd rather have a good debate on something like the state of the economic climate than talk about TOWIE or what I did at the weekend during my drinking session.

I'm going to stop myself there before I go into a rant about how society is in general today. :p
 
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