After a couple of days of trying and failing, I think I've finally managed to overcome my desire to binge on food. That said, I'm a little scared of tomorrow and everything after, which feels like more than I'm capable of handling by myself but I guess I just have to take things one step at a time and hopefully ease back into a healthy routine as a result. Things can't get better if I don't move forward but the further I go, the greater the distance I can fall again, which again, makes me feel a little nervous.
What really helped though, was finally going to see a doctor. He suggested anti-depressants might help, so that's a possibility in the near future. I'm not sure how to feel about needing pills to make myself feel better but it feels like a preferable alternative to my current mood.
On a more thoughtful note, I've felt like I could always relate to the thematic aspects of Puzzle (Biffy Clyro) but only today did I feel like I could really appreciate the significance of the lyrics, especially in 'As the dust dances'. The compulsion to eat really overwhelmed my life, as if it was the beginning and end of everything, even if it was only a symptom of a bigger problem. But the problem with the album is that things get better in the end, things begin to work out in a way, which is great and all but I'm not sure if/when I'll be able to boast the same. I guess I just have to think positive...
Sorry, this is pretty unrelated to the previous topic, I know.
