Start a rumour about the person above you! (Forum Game)

Hovis! was mistreated at a young age, since the father REALLY didn't want his baby made out of a loaf...
He threatened to "Grind his bones to make his bread." But was struggling to find them.
Hovis! can't figure out how many 'relitives' he has. It make him look like he's trying to be another Jesus, and counts everyone as his 'brother' etc.