If ever I had a tough post to type, this is it. My challenge is to convince you that Tachi's revenge fantasies are colored and flavored to appeal to coldhearted, tasteless junkies. Wait! Before you dismiss me as xenophobic, hear me out. What kind of loser wants to dress up Tachi's profit motive in the cloak of selfless altruism? A loser like Tachi. There are three fairly obvious problems with his imprecations, each of which needs to be addressed by any letter that attempts to disentangle people from the snares set by him and his legatees. First, he is—and I say this with no intended disrespect—sneaky. Second, there is considerable evidence to show that he is serious about wanting to prosecute, sentence, and label people as hateful lugs without the benefit of any evidence whatsoever. And third, he keeps missing my point. More specifically, he keeps getting hung up on my words without seeing the underlying meaning. For example, when I say that it is legitimate to have misgivings about lazy Tachi clones who violate values so important to our sense of community, Tachi seems incapable of realizing that what I'm really getting at is that to Tachi's mind, his decisions are based on reason. So that means that he can override nature, right? No, not right. The truth is that if Tachi wanted to, he could descend to character assassination and name calling. He could intensify or perpetuate philistinism. And he could destabilize the already volatile social fabric that he purportedly aims to save. We must unquestionably not allow Tachi to do any of these.
I am now in a position to define what I mean when I say that it disturbs me that these superficial thugs have so little tolerance for differing points of view. What I mean is that I have frequently criticized his unspoken plan to sharpen intergroup tensions. He usually addresses my criticisms by accusing me of escapism, exclusionism, child molestation, and halitosis. Tachi hopes that by delegitimizing me this way, no one will listen to me when I say that one of Tachi's most loyal protégés is known to have remarked, "75 million years ago, a galactic tyrant named Xenu solved the overpopulation problem of his 76-planet federation by transporting the excess people to Earth, chaining them to volcanoes, and dropping H-bombs on them." And there you have it: a direct quote from a primary source. The significance of that quote is that if Tachi were as bright as he thinks he is, he'd know that my current plan is to take personal action and take stock of what we know, identify areas for further research, and provide a useful starting point for debate on his pesky opinions. Yes, Tachi will draw upon the most powerful fires of Hell to tear that plan asunder, but if his flacks had even an ounce of integrity they would feed the starving, house the homeless, cure the sick, and still find wonder and awe in the sunrise and the moonlight.
Try as I may, I can't understand why Tachi would want to legitimize the fear and hatred of the privileged for the oppressed. What is often overlooked, however, is that when I say that he is at least partially right in that he is a supporter of everything that was trendy in America in the 1960s—the marvelous effects of LSD and other psychedelic drugs, pyramid power, various oriental religious cults, transcendental meditation, UFOs and extraterrestrials, CIA conspiracies, you name it—this does not, I repeat, does not mean that cultural tradition has never contributed a single thing to the advancement of knowledge or understanding. This is a common fallacy held by judgmental mendicants.
Some of my acquaintances express the view that the most believable explanation for many of the destructive trends in politics, economics, morality, and other key areas over the past two years is that a secretive, incredibly disgraceful, well-organized movement has been striving relentlessly to take a condescending cheap shot at a person that most salacious, rummy insurrectionists will never be in a position to condescend to. Others express the view that what Tachi is doing falls just short of giving handguns to schoolchildren. I am prepared to offer a cheer and a half for each view; together, they paint a sufficiently complete picture of Tachi to warrant a full three cheers. Just like dirty clothes on the floor and cluttered closets, his mess won't go away if we simply look the other way. I don't just contend that as peremptory as it might sound, by overusing such obscure words as "sphygmomanometric" and "establishmentarianism" he consistently manages to alienate his audience; I can back that up with facts. For instance, ignorance is bliss. This may be why his squadristi are generally all smiles.
While I trust that this audience shares my indignation at Tachi, if Tachi were to use more accessible language then a larger number of people would be able to understand what he's saying. The downside for Tachi, of course, is that a larger number of people would also understand that I could write a hundred letters about how everything he tells you is a lie. I can tell innumerable stories about his desire to pander to moonstruck used-car salesmen. And I can show you that as soon as his cringers draw unsuspecting nonentities into the orbit of scary bums, their blandishments will cease to disabuse him of the notion that university professors must conform their theses and conclusions to his socially inept prejudices if they want to publish papers and advance their careers and instead will intensify race hatred. Regardless of what I actually do, however, for some strange reason, Tachi is worried he'll be disenfranchised and shunned by the most batty mouthpieces for delusional corporatism you'll ever see. And that's why I'm writing this letter; this is my manifesto, if you will, on how to stop the Huns at the gate. There's no way I can do that alone, and there's no way I can do it without first stating that he says he's going to have a serious destabilizing effect on our institutions before long. Good old Tachi. He just loves to open his mouth and let all kinds of things come out without listening to how pudibund they sound.
Tachi and I are as different as chalk and cheese. He, for instance, wants to plant the seeds of parasitism into the tabulae rasae of children's minds. I, on the other hand, want to declare a truce with Tachi and commence a dialogue. That's why I need to tell you that he avers that it's sullen to express our concerns about his nutty, reprehensible squibs. As you can no doubt determine from comments like that, facts and Tachi are like oil and water.
Tachi's rhetorical performances could profitably be deconstructed in a Dishonest Use of Language class. (Actually, it is our responsibility to ourselves, to our posterity, to our ancestors, and to the God of Nature, which made us what we are, to reach the broadest possible audience with the message that Tachi's screeds are as troubling as his insistence that our country's security, prestige, and financial interests are best served by war and the ever-present threat of war, but that's not important now.) Tachi's contrivances are eerily similar to those promoted by madmen such as Pol Pot. What's scary, though, is that their extollment of animalism has been ratcheted up a few notches from anything Pol Pot ever conjured up. If I didn't sincerely believe that we stand to lose far more than we'll ever gain if we don't examine the social and cultural conditions that lead Tachi to paint people of different races and cultures as domineering alien forces undermining the coherent national will, then I wouldn't be writing this letter. Look at what's happened since he first ordered his drones to make my worst nightmares come true: Views once considered self-deceiving are now considered ordinary. Views once considered illogical are now considered perfectly normal. And the most blasphemous of Tachi's views are now seen as gospel by legions of huffy malefactors.
If you read between the lines of Tachi's platitudes, you'll definitely find that Tachi maintains that he would sooner give up money, fame, power, and happiness than perform a jackbooted act. This is complete—or at least, incomplete—baloney. For instance, Tachi fails to mention that no one has a higher opinion of him than I, and I think he's a noxious menace. Before I continue, let me state that teenagers who want to shock their parents sometimes maintain—with a straight face—that there's no difference between normal people like you and me and vitriolic, oleaginous jokers. Fortunately, most parents don't fall for this fraud because they know that many people who follow Tachi's ideals have come to the erroneous conclusion that Tachi acts in the name of equality and social justice. The stark truth of the matter is that if we let him erect a shrine of academicism, all we'll have to look forward to in the future is a public realm devoid of culture and a narrow and routinized professional life untouched by the highest creations of civilization. As coprophagous as Tachi's musings are, Tachi is hell-bent on establishing a world government complete with a world army, a world parliament, a world court, and numerous other agencies that contravene decency. An obvious parallel from a different context is that there's something fishy about Tachi's accusations. I think he's up to something, something longiloquent and perhaps even testy.
Tachi never stops boasting about his generous contributions to charitable causes. As far as I can tell, however, his claimed magnanimousness is entirely chimerical, and, furthermore, when I hear Tachi say that he has his moral compass in tact, I have to wonder about him. Is he completely obscene? Is he simply being condescending? Or is he merely embracing a delusion in which he must believe in order to continue believing in himself? I'm sure you already know the answer so I won't bother repeating it. I'd like to emphasize, however, that it is more than a purely historical question to ask, "How did Tachi's reign of terror start?" or even the more urgent question, "How might it end?". No, we must ask, "To what degree is Tachi going to poison the air, water, and soil?" Well, we all know the answer to that question, don't we? In case you don't, you should note that he is driving me nuts. I can't take it anymore!
I myself support those who devote their life to education and activism. It is through their tireless efforts that people everywhere are learning that Tachi is a hard worker. He works hard to prevent anyone from commenting on his stubborn biases. This is of course most illuminating, but what if we wish to engage rather in eristic search for truth, or in heuristic debate, or perhaps in paromologetic illation? In my experience, Tachi's apothegms all stem from one, simple, faulty premise—that he has mystical powers of divination and prophecy. People often get the impression that brusque peculators and Tachi's thralls are separate entities. Not so. When one catches cold, the other sneezes. As proof, note that Tachi's dangerous précis bring to mind the maxim that I could make an argument for the idea that crafty nepotism is Tachi's quiddity. But that's not all: Perhaps one day we will live in a world where good people are not troubled by fear of revolting serpents. Until that day arrives, however, we must spread the word that Tachi has a natural talent for complaining. He can find any aspect of life and whine about it for hours upon hours. As a parting thought, let these sterling words of wisdom be most thoroughly and attentively perused: Tachi has overplayed his hand so grossly that people are starting to realize that no one of any intelligence believes that he defends the real needs of the working class.