Perhaps in part because it marks the end of the Dominion anime for the forseeable future (there is no more, nothing else exists, let's be clear on that)
Oh no, we've come this far, there's no turning back now. But not to worry folks, I've watched it again so you don't have to.
Tank S.W.A.T. 01 -
Kill all the golfers
Does this look like the face of mercy?
Tank S.W.A.T. 01 opens with the kind of music you hear when placed on hold by your insurance company, which continues to play for the rest of its thankfully short runtime and sets the tone nicely for what's to come. This is how the story begins: In a grey, grey world there's a grey, grey building, in the grey, grey building there's a grey, grey corridor, off the grey, grey corridor there's a grey, grey room, in the grey, grey room there's a grey, grey desk and at the grey, grey desk there's UniPuma and Asada, a character whose picture appears in the dictionary under the definition of "pathetic".
Asada doesn't seem like she could even hack it at the welfare department, yet here she is in the Tank Police for some reason. Specifically, that reason is to be a damsel in distress for the rest of the squad for the next 20 minutes. The rest of the squad! I know what you're thinking - Our lovable rogues like the Chief, Brenten, Megane, and Chaplain right? Wrong. This time in addition to the newly deputised Pumas we have Conflict One newbies Havana and Shinozaki, whose personalities are not available at this time. The Blandening continues with the replacement of the Chief with "Japanese_Salaryman_001" ($5 on TurboSquid) and his clone army.
"Execute Order 66, it'll be a kindness."
The show does however feature Pumas in uniform (probably the show's only mildly redeeming feature) and it's fairly obvious the production crew liked them the best. It seems like more time was spent on animating Anna and Uni than anyone else, as a result they come out of TS01 the most expressive and least hard done by. Most of the other characters look like blank-faced marionettes (including Leona, who to say she's ostensibly the main character barely even has a character here) reduced to merely flapping their mouths most of the time, occasionally without any accompanying dialogue. The Pumas also get to save the day multiple times, to the point the two of them probably could have handled this entire operation better if the rest of this sorry excuse for a Tank Police squad were entirely absent.
It's okay Uni, it'll all be over soon.
For an animation that seems so keen to show off action involving physics, said physics are easily the worst part of the animation. Whether the characters are being blown away by explosions, falling down lift shafts, bouncing hilariously up and down stairs or getting knocked around with a golf club, they never seem like they have the slightest bit of weight to them and just sort of... float off. Which is probably why slow-motion was so overused, as it does
sort of cover it up, though rather unconvincingly. I'm going to try playing these scenes sped up later, it might actually give me a laugh, which TS01 also utterly failed to do.
Unseen test footage of The Matrix starring John Candy
And that, really, is TS01's cardinal sin. Not the stiff 3D animation, though it drains characters of their expressiveness and action scenes of their impact (it's not really any worse than the episodes of RWBY I've seen in that regard). The worst thing about Tank S.W.A.T. 01 is that it's
dull. It's devoid of humour. It's devoid of excitement. It's lacking in fun and eccentric characters and settings. Even the colour palette is desaturated and dominated by grey and brown. Everything that makes Dominion
Dominion has been cut out of it like a lobotomy, and we're left with a stranger wearing its face. I could go into the plot, but there's really no point, suffice to say that if you need to end a story
with a monologue explaining one of the plot points you probably didn't do a very good job of storytelling.