Anime diseases

Hent Eye
This condition affects an overwhelming number of female characters in harem and romantic comedy anime, and is typified by psychotic delusions that cause the sufferer to perceive a bland male protagonist as a pervert. While behavioural studies have shown that bland male protagonists have a disproportionately high incidence of walking in on girls in the bathroom, or being present when a girl falls over and has her underwear exposed, a case of Hent Eye extends far beyond such easily misinterpreted scenarios. For a clinical diagnosis of Hent Eye, the sufferer must perceive any and all actions undertaken by the protagonist as an act of perversion. This includes, but is not limited to: attempting to help the girl during an emotional crisis, attempting to spend any time alone with the girl, attempting to spend any time with a group of people that includes the girl, attempting to speak to the girl, attempting to speak to anyone else while in the girl's presence, not speaking, looking at the girl, not looking at the girl, entering any room where the girl is present, being in a room that the girl enters, or simply existing.
 
Parental Wonderlust
A condition where parents hate to spend time with thier children and go traveling around the country or world rather than looking after thier offspring. Often found in romance and harem anime thankfully childhood friends step up to the plate and look after them. Side affects include, living on your own, having a childhood friend who has a crush on you and being completely self sufficient financially and emotionally from your parents. So far this condition is unique to anime and specifically Japan where is presume ther are large numbers of teenage children living alone.
 
Mid-Season Paralysis
This condition causes an anime character's range of movement to atrophy as the season progresses, sometimes being reduced to the point that only the lips can move. Typically seen in series that haven't managed their budget or schedule effectively, or where management have cynically front-loaded resources onto the first episode. Due to the character only being able to change position while no one is looking at them, it has been hypothesised that Mid-Season Paralysis may be an early stage of transforming into a Weeping Angel, but research is ongoing. This condition is often seen with comorbid Mid-Season Proteus Syndrome, a debilitating bone disease that causes the character's skeleton to randomly deform, known coloquially as Going Off-Model.

Simulcast Dementia
Unlike most anime diseases, this one affects the viewer rather then the characters. The tell-tale symptom of Simulcast Dementia is the inability to remember shows the sufferer watched in previous seasons. Onset is most commonly three months after a show finishes airing, but can be as little as a week in extreme cases. Sufferers typically self-diagnose upon stumbling across an earlier season's show and noticing that it's already marked as watched. Common reactions range from, "Oh yeah, that was pretty decent. How did I forget it existed?" to "Wait, I watched that already?" Almost unheard of before the turn of the millennium, the exponential growth of anime produced in the years since is considered a key factor in the spread of this condition.
 
Compulsive Knife-Licking Disorder
Frequently seen among nameless thugs in post-apocalyptic environments. Often mistaken for an attempt to intimidate potential victims, the true cause of compulsive knife-licking is iron deficiency caused by the inability to maintain a balanced diet after the fall of civilisation. This disorder carries the associated risk of sepsis developing from lacerations of the tongue, which is often untreatable due to the lack of antibiotics in the wasteland. In practice, sepsis rarely has time to take hold, as knife-licking thugs tend to be beaten to death by muscle-bound protagonists.
 
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