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Message: <blockquote data-quote="ayase" data-source="post: 609895" data-attributes="member: 183">[USER=4169]@IdiomaticLynx[/USER] I am once again grateful for your response and understand what you’re saying, but I don’t think conversational skill itself is where I fall down. It was once upon a time, and a lot of that advice is stuff the me of ten years ago would have greatly appreciated (that might have saved me some counselling and therapy sessions) but I’m pretty comfortable in social settings now. It’s more that I find very few people seem to want to take conversation in deeper and perhaps more challenging or uncomfortable directions (I mean like, one who isn’t also related to me would at least be a start) and I think that’s mainly down to me being willing to be more relaxed and open in conversation than most people, rather than less.Part of that, I strongly suspect is that most people my age or older have settled into their circles of friends and partners and aren’t really looking for any more. Moving on to that point about growing those social circles, that’s not necessarily a killer because the small circle of friends I do have are younger than me anyway (and their attitudes and interests are far less boring) which might have given me some scope for expansion if it wasn’t pretty much a closed circle with only us in it (and isn’t going to do anything on the female company front considering we’re all male). We met via education, which was great because we all at least had a common interest and work we had chosen to do (although going back I perhaps should have picked a less male-dominated field, I go to university for four years and don’t make a single female friend, is there any hope? I might as well have, it doesn’t seem to have done anything for my employment prospects given my current situation) but now that’s over I don’t really know where to look.It’s like I need to break out of my regular social contacts and find new ones, but the common interests that bind me to other people (say my current friends, or even here on AUKN) aren’t introducing me to the kind of people who interest me (no offence to anyone here, you’re all great even on the occasions you do leave me hanging, [USER=2]@Rui[/USER] and [USER=246]@Vashdaman[/USER] especially since you guys actually challenge me on the regular, but I can’t really hang out and do stuff with you, or expand my social contacts that way since you all disappear when I shut my computer down) and, how do I put this without sounding horribly judgemental? A lot of people who share interests with me often just seem a bit wet, like I almost feel as though in order to meet people with attitudes and personalities I like, I’d have to feign interest in things I don’t.Who even bloody knows? I’m just rambling now and I suppose I’m not really expecting answers from anyone here (and it wouldn’t be fair to) but thank you for your posts [USER=4169]@IdiomaticLynx[/USER], reading other people’s thoughts on my thoughts is the kind of thing I enjoy, after all!</blockquote>

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