Guy Dumps Girlfriend Live Over Radio

Will-O'-The-Wisp

Will-O'-The-Wisp

Cardcaptor
Recording of it all is in the link, basically after 5 years together, he wanted to propose to her, untill he found out she was kissing some other guy (and she knew he was going to propose to her the up-coming Valentine's Day).

Instead of just telling her they were through, he got a little creative and decided to do it over a radio station he listened to, and had the DJ's trick her into thinking he was going to propose to him.

Link: http://existenz.se/out.php?id=21478

The DJ's are dicks though and didn't really help the situation on either person's part

...

I thought it was quite funny :p
 
Cruelty makes everything better. v_v

Again, it's the fact that people feel as though monogamy is the natural state of things which is to blame. That's what upset the guy, that's what made the girl hide the fact that she had (in the eyes of our current society) "cheated". She clearly did still care for him.

Now, here's what should have happened:

"Darling, I'm quite attracted to another man, even though I still love and want to be with you. Would it be okay if I had a relationship with him as well?"

Answer One: "As long as he gets checked out for STDs and you allow me the same privilege at some point, certainly. My feelings towards you won't change."

Answer Two: "No, I'm afraid I'm not willing to share your affections with someone else and were you to start a relationship with another person then my feelings towards you would change. If that's unacceptable to you then we should probably bring our own relationship to an end."

People can choose to be civil and honest about this stuff if they want to.
 
ayase said:
Again, it's the fact that people feel as though monogamy is the natural state of things which is to blame. That's what upset the guy, that's what made the girl hide the fact that she had cheated. She clearly did still care for him.
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Monogamy is widely accepted as the natural way for humans. I can't see any argument against that. Because less intelligent animals may mate with anyone, it's still always a fight over the woman. Whether this be a physical fight, or a fight over who can impress the woman the most. This is no different in modern day - Girl goes out with Guy she likes, or visa versa.

Also, by the simple fact you used the word "cheated" you've already shown the guy wouldn't want her sleeping with other men. You can't say she clearly still cared for him, because she lied to him. If she loved him, and cared, surely she would have told the truth. Surely if she cared she wouldn't have cheated on him, despite knowing it would hurt him.

Sorry Ayase, your argument really doesn't hold water. Sure, I can see you're a fan of ****-buddies, and think "Relationships are over-rated", but you can't claim that it is normal for everyone to be like that.

Please do show me the other side though. I'd be interested to see exactly what you're trying to say. Here is a hint though, try not to blame society for everything.
 
You can cheat on somebody and still care deeply for the one you cheated on you know @_@. To her it might have just been pure Lust, something to use up her little kinky urges and then continue her relationship with her boyfriend. Monogamy is sometimes to blame as it's not uncommon for people to cheat purely because they feel they're trapped in a relationship. I wouldn't say this applies to the broken couple on the radio though, I doubt she would have been so willing to of accepted his "proposal" in that case (she was blatently going to say yes)
 
Will-O'-The-Wisp said:
You can cheat on somebody and still care deeply for the one you cheated on you know @_@.
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I don't really buy it. Sure, may care in some ways, but most certainly not deeply enough to keep a relationship with one. Simply put, if you know that your partner doesn't want you to be with another person (which lets face it, is the normal. You should assume this if the topic hasn't been discussed) then you simply don't cheat on them if you care for them.

Will-O'-The-Wisp said:
To her it might have just been pure Lust, something to use up her little kinky urges and then continue her relationship with her boyfriend.
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lol. Riiight. Surely, if you she needed these urges satisfied, she should have asked her boyfriend? Assuming he said no, that's no reason for her to cheat on him when she knows he would be upset if she did so. If they both consent to a monogamous relationship, then neither of them should break the rules of a monogamous relationship. That, is very, very simple.


Will-O'-The-Wisp said:
Monogamy is sometimes to blame as it's not uncommon for people to cheat purely because they feel they're trapped in a relationship.
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That's a sign that the partner is over-protective, too controlling, or something similar though normally. I admit, sure, for some people monogamy isn't for them, but these people are a minority. Most people can find a single (As in, one, singular, not someone who's not in a relationship, lol) person to settle down with, as opposed to multiple people to settle down with.
 
I think that to each their own, I'm more inclined towards monogamy, but I can't go the same way as Spyro. Simply put, the threesome is one of the oldest and most common fantasies ever, also it's the main reason, most guys don't get annoyed with two girls kissing, but they do get annoyed with two guys kissing.

Also, monogamy was actually forced into people on most cultures and the main issue i've got with monogamy is actually the way it's used as a tool for oppression.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Value_of_monogamy

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy
 
chaos said:
Simply put, the threesome is one of the oldest and most common fantasies ever, also it's the main reason, most guys don't get annoyed with two girls kissing, but they do get annoyed with two guys kissing.
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I love that logic, lol. Surely, men don't mind two women kissing because (assuming these men aren't homosexual) they are attracted to women, therefore 2 of them kissing is twice the fun. And the reason they're against two men kissing is because they aren't attracted to men, so therefore twice as bad. Seems more likely to me.


chaos said:
Also, monogamy was actually forced into people on most cultures and the main issue i've got with monogamy is actually the way it's used as a tool for oppression.
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Right, assuming you mean, as your link suggests, about the 'oppression of women'? I'm pretty sure women have enough rights to agree that they aren't oppressed just because they get married.
 
Chun Li said:
Also, by the simple fact you used the word "cheated" you've already shown the guy wouldn't want her sleeping with other men. You can't say she clearly still cared for him, because she lied to him. If she loved him, and cared, surely she would have told the truth. Surely if she cared she wouldn't have cheated on him, despite knowing it would hurt him..
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Fixed the cheated thing (sorry, I blamed society again - I can't see what else to do. People's attitudes are to blame, and their attitudes are a result of the society they are brought up in). People lie about cheating precisely because they don't want to hurt the other person and often because they still love them as well, which given the amount of separations / divorces due to "cheating" I think is a pretty persuasive argument that monogamy is far from the norm.

Look, I don't claim that no-one is capable of having monogamous relationships. I don't think people should be forced to do or not do anything they don't want to based on what is or is not considered "natural". It's barely even worth discussing as there are so many people out there living in all kinds of relationship arrangements already. Everybody's different. My argument is simply that people shouldn't be chastised (and certainly not have some kind of revenge taken on them) for behaving a certain way which is seen as "wrong".
 
ayase said:
My argument is simply that people shouldn't be chastised (and certainly not have some kind of revenge taken on them) for behaving a certain way which is seen as "wrong".
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These are still a minority compared to the amount of monogamous relationships that work though.

Don't get me wrong, I am all for polygamous relationships if all parties involved are consenting. The problem I had here is, the guy was definitely not consenting. So, if you want to avoid morals, she broke a "Rule of the Relationship" that she wouldn't cheat on him.

You see where i'm coming from?
 
And this is where I think attitudes come into it. Why was he not consenting? Firstly, because she didn't tell him. Why did she not tell him? Presumably because she knew he would see it as cheating but also (and most importantly) because she didn't want him to leave her. If she truly didn't care about him, she would have left him for the other guy. In those cases I agree people are probably monogamous, they find someone new and leave their partners for them. If they don't leave their partners, it can only be because they also still love them. Ergo those people are not monogamous. And that's where the problem is. Probably the guy was monogamous, the girl wasn't - That doesn't make either of them right or wrong, it just makes them different. And it's worth bearing in mind it's unlikely people know whether they are monogamous or not until they are in a relationship. How can you know if you're capable of loving more than one person unless you are already in love with one person? And if the other person in that relationship is not able to cope with that, then there's going to be a problem. But that problem of different attitudes isn't specifically the fault of either of the people in that relationship, and I don't think it should be treated that way.
 
Chun Li said:
I don't really buy it. then you simply don't cheat on them if you care for them.
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If you don't buy it, then it's down to you. But people do cheat on those they care for and have regrets later on


Chun_Li said:
Surely, if you she needed these urges satisfied, she should have asked her boyfriend? Assuming he said no, that's no reason for her to cheat on him when she knows he would be upset if she did so. If they both consent to a monogamous relationship, then neither of them should break the rules of a monogamous relationship. That, is very, very simple.
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"Lol right?" Noo. I'm sure she has asked her boyfreind. Many, many times, and in the end, one possibility is that their sex life lost it's sparkle at some point. Do you honestly think a relationship is as black and white like you make out to all people? No chance in hell, of course people cheat out of pure lust. And consenting to a monogamous relationship goes without saying, but you're very niave if you think it's as "simple" as you make out and that basic relationship rules aren't broken. I'm not saying it's okay, I'm straight-edge. I'm saying it happens and that you can't rule out the possibility that it was a fling.

Chun_Li said:
That's a sign that the partner is over-protective, too controlling, or something similar though normally
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No, this isn't always the case. You can be with the perfect partner and still feel trapped. Not because the partner is a control freak, but because you're limiting what you can and can't do when you're with someone
 
She got what she deserved. It's harsher than what I thought, but wope away the crocodile tears and you got yourself a lying, cheating and desperate woman. Exactly as the b/f said "There shouldn't be any hessitation when asked..."

I'll try and cover the areas mentioned between you guys and share my view:
1 - (Monogamy/Polygamy) I can understand that you canhave societies with either one of the "marrage statuses" from anywhere and any ethnic of the world. I dont have a problem if the whole party involed agrees to be in one or the other. In monogamy, the partners have to respect and be truthful about their vows to only the 2 involved. And all the polygamous partners should all be notified before an actual new relationship is formed, so you dont screw with the wrong person (so to speak).

2 - (The Rules) If you are in a monogamous relationship, you're ment to be honest and loyal to your partner. If any mistakes are made, you dont hide it and you work things out together, or you break up mutually.
In a polygamous relationship, you do not simply jump on anyone you like and hope for the best the others are completely accepting. You discuss things and it should be an overall judgement or if one person disagrees then it cant be. Someone will have to be sacrificed as the partner, either the outsider or the existing lover.

3 - (The current issue) - That Ashley was totally unethical about it. She hides the truth of the relationship (even if she is forced to admit it over the radio), then she begs for mercy and loses whatever pride she should have. Pathetic. If she didn't want this, she shouldn't have fooled around with another guy - End off!
Finally, if she wanted to stop the embarrassment, she could of hung up when she was beaten... but she's a real clutz for punishment.
 
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